theporterslog@gmail.com
16th May 2022

The Porter’s Log guide to a socially-distanced RAG blind date

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As if 2020 couldn’t get any worse, RAG Blind Date is back early for an extra instalment this Michaelmas, offering lonely Cambridge students a chance to find love before coughing season.  

To help, the Porter’s Log has put together some tips on how to make the best of your date, which, much like graduation, could be virtual, socially-distanced, or in absentia.

  1. Don’t go.
  2. Losing taste is a symptom of Covid-19.  If someone matches with you, you are required to report them to the University so they can get tested. This can be a long-term effect, which is why even after beating Covid, your best friend still has no taste in men.
  3. Losing smell is also a symptom of Covid-19.  Trinmos, try finding a date who’s Covid-positive.
  4. If your date is online, insist your date turns off their camera.  It’s a blind date for a reason.
  5. If you think your date is going badly, try going to a break-out room.
  6. CompScis, you can pre-record your date for practice, then upload it to Panopto.
  7. If you match with a CompSci, make use of the fast-forward button.

Follow our advice and you’ll soon remember why you chose to be single in the first place.