Articles by The Porter
Trinity men demand male-only breakfast to celebrate over 400 years of male admission
A group of male students at Trinity has called for a special male-only breakfast to be held to celebrate men’s admission to the college in 1546.
Our Grade, Our Choice leader: “I don’t want people to know about my amazing exam results”
The leader of Our Grade, Our Choice has spoken of her struggle to persuade the University not to publish her consistently high grades.
Blues footballer’s injury “a real pain in the arse”
The manager of the University football team has described the injury of his star striker as “a real pain in the arse”.
Notice from the Dean about parties in college
Message from the Dean, please circulate:
Landmines to be installed to keep students off grass
The University is taking new measures to keep students off the grass by drafting in a team of military specialists to plant landmines under college courts.
Atheist Union to kick students in genitals in new recruitment drive
The Cambridge University Atheist Union has announced plans to kick students in the privates as they leave Cindies in a bid to attract new members.
Drinking soc alumni bemoan low death count at initiations
Alumni of The Lambshaggers drinking society this week voiced concerns that not nearly enough people have died at recent initiation ceremonies.